1 We would, Mistress, if we only knew WTF you were talking about... That said, knowing what lies in store for having spoken those words, how about if the potential mobsters decide to open an social/athletic club and leave bad deeds to someone else. Or show up 'en masse' at the local police station to confess their bad acts and receive their just punishment. They cam some some points with the local Dems and press if they spout something like "We just can't keep up with Repubs so we decided to quit!" Nancy Pelosi would cry and give them all a pardon... Disclaimer: I employ an infinite amount of monkeys to compose my thoughts. No monkey was harmed when this message was generated.

2 Well, I do like a storybook ending. And, of course, unharmed monkeys.

3 Have a rival mob rub them out off-camera.

4 OK, how about this: The protagonist is meeting her sister for lunch at Philippe's. It is obvious to our heroine that her sister is beaming and it isn't the roast beef, as good as it may be, that is responsible. When asked for an explanation, she is evasive and enjoys seeing your-OK you're the star- increasing frustration (she has always been a big, damn tease). Before she is throttled she finally relents and gushes forth with the news that her knight in shining armor has, at last, entered her realm. (Hmm, LIFE may be a better word than realm for those dirty minds out there.) Anyway, you're amused but find it too difficult to hide your lack of enthusiasm. The tables are turned and even though she fumes that your work and you can go to hell she still manages to give a warm hug on departing. Hey, she's a good kid. Over what seems like no time at all the relationship blossoms. He is a paralegal going through law school. His employer's office is in the building across from where your sister works. He had to overcome some outrageous obstacles just to get as far as he has. Sis is smitten. You finally meet the enchanted couple for happy hour at Carmine's. The impression made is a favorable one and it's not the Mojitos that are influencing your decision; although they don't hurt. Eventually, the family and you come around. He may well be good enough. It is with sincere delight and perhaps a little envy the sensation felt when words comes in of there engagement. Everyone is happy, save for one soul; the knight's ex. (Ex, axe, not bad , huh?) The young mans boss is legal cousel to a man who is the force behind the Arroyo Seco Clan (a made-up name...I hope). This criminal enterprise carved out a presence on the streets of northeast Los Angeles through blood , steel and the maddening will of a single man. This man may have had a wife and children but he had no time for family. Among his neglected was a daughter who grew to be a woman of lovely form and intense drive. The knight had been courting this woman before your sister's eyes arrested him. The heartbreak was not consolable. Daddy had no time to deal with personal matters like this, besides it only got in the way of business and business is what mattered. His daughter did not share this phlosophy. She had to make her love feel what she was feeling. Your sister was aware of the enmity but nowhere near as concerned as you were. At this point it must be pointed out now that our heroine and her sister had a remarkable resemblance. Despite a three year difference in age they were often confused for twins growing up. Along with appearance the two had much in common; restaurants, music and sport. This would lead to consequences never dreamed of by either one. It was during a daily jog by our heroine through Eaton Canyon when life became complicated. Midway into the workout and running uphill a dark car raced up to block the path of the run. Tormented eyes greeted her. Our heroine was afraid. With savagery the driver stepped out and rushed at the runner. The frenetic assault failed, however, as our heroine proved to be sufficiently agile to evade the attack leading to the attacker tumbling down the hillside. Stunned momentarily, it takes a few seconds to regain your faculties. You look down and realize she is seriously hurt. You flag a passing driver, dial 911 and try to reach her, nearly falling down in the process. She is still alive but incoherent. To your horror, she whispers your sister's name before losing consciousness. Police and emergency services come onto to the scene. You can only share the obvious with the authorities but just can't bring yourself to relate the details behind the fall. You give a fake name and address before leaving. The look of those eyes still haunt you; eliciting a fear of which you want no part. You seek refuge. You go home. In the arms of your husband a sense of security slowly returned as day passed and evening came. That peace would be short lived. One of the lead stories in the local news that night was about a mobster's daughter being seriously injured and in a coma. "It can't be." Who else knows? Was the exes plot shared with anyone? The authorities would soon realize they had been lied to. What then? Thoughts of forensics entered her mind. Should our heroine share this with her sister? Would it be better if the woman dies or recovers? There was no sleep to be had that night.

5 Wow. I thought I was joking. Wow.

6 You know, I only intended a line or two but, just like in the moments I tell my kids (2 little orcs) I love them, was overcome by temporary insanity.

7 We find out Haliburton was behind everything. The protagonist goes to the press, the company's stock plummets, the CEO jumps off the company building, and everyone lives happily every after--except for Haliburton stockholders.