September 25, 2006
Still Depressed.
Or perhaps unhappy. I think I'm a bit low on estrogen right now.
Also, I'm drinking diet fucking tonic water with a wedge of lime: no sugar, no alcohol, no caffeine. No fucking good, really.
I need to produce a chapter a day for the next two days, and that would be okay if I didn't also have other work to do alongside it all. The beauty of it all?—deep down, I know I have the bitchinest life. I mean, geez: I'm within 100 pages of finishing the draft for my murder mystery. How cool is that?
Posted by: Attila Girl at
04:23 PM
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1
dude. That's just plain water. don't even try to fool yourself.
Posted by: caltechgirl at September 26, 2006 08:18 PM (r0kgl)
2
It was a sad, sad, drink.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 26, 2006 11:02 PM (LEEsJ)
3
Sparkling water though. I drink a lot of that as an alternate to the sugary version.
Posted by: Desert Cat at September 30, 2006 07:56 AM (xdX36)
4
I'm still on it, due to the fact that I simply can't afford the calories of the kind I like.
But I'm still adjusting.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 30, 2006 08:03 AM (LEEsJ)
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September 18, 2006
"Did You Meet Your Mother's New Dog?" Attila the Hub Asks.
"Yes, I did. What a sweet puppy."
"What breed is she?"
"Breed? Ah, yes. Well, we think she's a mix—maybe with some Labrador."
He looks at me, hard. "Rottweiler, Doberman, or Pit Bull?"
I sigh. "Pit Bull. But a really cute, good-natured one."
Posted by: Attila Girl at
12:13 AM
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1
Pit bull's are always "good-natured" when they don't bite YOUR face off.
Posted by: Sean Hackbarth at September 18, 2006 10:24 PM (RiZPJ)
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aHAH! So the Attila Hub frowns upon the bred-to-be variety of fight dog?
Posted by: k at September 19, 2006 09:37 AM (fEnUg)
3
One less thing to worry about with my mother turning 70 this year, and living alone.
The nice doggie is very nice. She needs to chew on fewer things; perhaps my mother should get her more chew toys. I don't think the doorjamb was the best possible choice. I'm also trying to get her away from chewing furniture.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 19, 2006 08:03 PM (9c7FW)
4
Make sure a taser is on hand. For the dog and any intruders.
Posted by: Sean Hackbarth at September 19, 2006 11:43 PM (RiZPJ)
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She has one of my revolvers, just in case.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 20, 2006 12:06 AM (LEEsJ)
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Great work!
http://spogqcvb.com/trwt/eonh.html | http://gxqskcxv.com/lugh/toox.html
Posted by: Ethan at September 22, 2006 07:07 PM (By9mn)
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September 09, 2006
I Drop by Hog's Place.
"I'm trying to lose weight," I tell him.
"Yeah? What are you doing?"
"I haven't figured it out. I'm certainly not willing to exercise, or to eat any differently."
He looks at me for a moment. Finally: "well, good luck with that."
Is that insensitive, or what?
Posted by: Attila Girl at
06:50 PM
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1
Yes. And your point?
As one who is also wanting to lose weight I have found that being sensitive does not help. I sure wish it did.
I also hate to exercise and change my diet too. However it is starting to hurt my golf game. So I too am going to be working on weight loss program. Lousy time to start with all the holidays coming up,.... but procrastination also doesn't help.
Wish us both good luck with this endevor.
Posted by: Jack at September 09, 2006 07:31 PM (JoPCP)
2
Good luck to all of us. One of those things that's always harder to do than it sounds.
Posted by: k at September 09, 2006 08:30 PM (GIL7z)
3
I finally stopped ignoring my gym membership and roped daughter #3 into a mutual misery pact.
We started last week with a step class... which we both left feeling really depressed (good lord, 15 minutes in and my legs felt like someone strapped 50 lb weights on each one)
But we met each lunch for four days last week... starting back on Monday.
BTW... I think the definition of menopause should also include metabolpause...
argh
Posted by: Darleen at September 10, 2006 11:16 AM (cXz8w)
4
I should just suck it up and join curves, which my mother has been trying to get me to do for a while.
I'd like to do yoga, but I can't really justify two memberships right now, and I have an urgent need for cardio . . .
I also need to re-up in the martial arts; I'm pretty miserable without jujitsu, if you want to know the truth.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 10, 2006 03:37 PM (LEEsJ)
5
Margaret Cho hit the nail on the head when she said that the "fuck it" diet (eat whatever you want and then say "fuck it') works best when complemented by the "fuck that shit" exercise program. Unfortunately, I'm an expert at both.
Posted by: Prof. Purkinje at September 10, 2006 04:44 PM (Hb7cO)
6
I remember when you said you'd always imagined vegetarians had healthier diets than most people--right up to the moment that JAT invented, as you put it, "the 90% fudge diet."
Mine is 90% gin. If I cut out the tonic water, I'd weigh 100 pounds or so.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 10, 2006 06:27 PM (LEEsJ)
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New taste diet;
Put it in your mouth.
Taste it.
If it tastes good;
Spit it out, it's bad for you!
Posted by: Jack at September 10, 2006 07:44 PM (q9Jst)
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"Gin" chic?
Don't tell the fashion industry.
Posted by: Sean Hackbarth at September 11, 2006 05:43 PM (RiZPJ)
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I have the opposite problem. I'm trying to gain weight. It's not as easy as it can sound....
I'm the hungry monster, sigh. Constantly hunting for food, on a kitchen raid, begging my hubby to get me some food (or I'll eat him alive :-)
After a while, you get tired of the hunt. It's all the same. You've seen so many dishes - they all look and taste almost the same.
You want that very special one, that fit YOUR taste perfectly, but where to find it? Does it even exist in real life?
You'll never know when you will find your soul meat ;-)
Posted by: Lifecruiser at September 12, 2006 09:29 AM (9fTBB)
10
Double entendres aside, I'm having trouble seeing any consistency among: Greek orzo, Thai beef salad, and peach pie.
I do understand that sometimes a few bites are enough before one gets bored.
Once you hit 42 or so, however, this will cease to be a dietary Saving Grace. Portion control becomes a lot less effective at that point. That's when you want to start eating your husband alive--and vice versa.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 12, 2006 12:46 PM (LEEsJ)
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And what's so wrong with that? Wouldn't the opposite be some sort of sick necrophilia?
Posted by: Desert Cat at September 12, 2006 09:40 PM (xdX36)
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Yup! Not just necrophilia, which is bad enough. But the sick kind!
"Honey, you can have all the oral you want. After I'm dead."
(I wonder if LifeCruiser is beginning to regret stopping by.)
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 13, 2006 12:44 AM (LEEsJ)
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September 05, 2006
I Need a New Hobby.
But I can't decide between crochet and smack.
Thoughts?
Posted by: Attila Girl at
10:17 PM
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1
You could crochet a hyperdermic needle cozy.
Posted by: Sean Hackbarth at September 05, 2006 10:33 PM (RiZPJ)
2
That's like . . . that's deep, man. Clean works: really important.
That could really work; I'll be back later to implement the plan: need some yarn, a hook and a syringe.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 05, 2006 10:40 PM (LEEsJ)
3
You could sell them on eBay. Just don't mention what they really are.
Then when sales take off--I'm eyeing the Dutch market--you could expand into coke spoon cozies and something for marijuana. "You can put your weed in it."
Posted by: Sean Hackbarth at September 05, 2006 11:46 PM (RiZPJ)
4
I believe the smoke shops around here persistently use the term "material."
To me, of course, a coke spoon is a 70s-revival nostalgia item, and I could see getting one for that reason.
I suspect the Feds wouldn't see it that way. Hyperactive folks: They're all on meth. Had you noticed?
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 06, 2006 12:36 AM (LEEsJ)
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Back in the early 80s I was in England, and my girlfriend and I went into an antique shop to look around in this little country town. She bought me a little tiny silver antique spoon. Or I thought it was an antique baby's spoon, until she told me what it was. DOH. Later, I wondered if the little old lady that ran the shop knew what she was selling, for they had several "baby spoons" in their display case. LOL It definitely gives new meaning to "antiquing".
Posted by: clyde at September 06, 2006 04:36 AM (6m+7s)
6
Shrooms. Crocheting on shrooms.
Posted by: Desert Cat at September 06, 2006 06:23 PM (xdX36)
7
well, smack wouldn't eat up as much closet space. i swear all that yarn is breeding.
Posted by: maggie katzen at September 06, 2006 10:01 PM (wIQcY)
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September 03, 2006
All I Want
. . . is for someone to tell me that my book is
so bad, I should just give up on it and spend the rest of my days eating those little frozen Trader Joe's appetizers. You know: the ones that are like tiny little savory tarts.
None of my bulletin boards are active right now.
I shall have to resort to productive activity. And there aren't any little tarts in the house. (Oh, shut up! You know how I meant it.)
Posted by: Attila Girl at
09:49 PM
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I like savory little tarts, too.
Wait...what sort of treat are we talking about?
Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at September 05, 2006 06:05 AM (1hM1d)
2
Just couldn't help yourself, huh?
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 05, 2006 09:09 AM (LEEsJ)
3
No, of course not. Savory little tarts are hard to pass up. But you knew that... ;-)
Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at September 05, 2006 01:01 PM (1hM1d)
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September 02, 2006
Fun in Chatsworth
Reverend Kevin—really, "Mr. Kevin," since he's teaching school again—has now been installed into his mobile home.
A victim of gender stereotyping, I ended up putting a lot of the food, dishes, and pots and pans away in his kitchen, only moving a few of the smaller pieces of actual furniture.
Between all the different Christian groups there, it could have been a bit theologically eclectic. Perhaps I should have started a food fight over sola scriptura or some such.
Posted by: Attila Girl at
10:11 PM
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September 01, 2006
So, I Screwed Somthing Up.
Attila the Hub got miffed, and quite rightly.
I hate being in the wrong.
Finally, I went into the family room. He looked up and gave me that "I'm not ready to be friends yet" look.
"Listen," I told him. "I just came down to see if I could kiss your ass."
"Then you should have brought snacks," he replied.
So I went back to the kitchen and got him snacks.
Posted by: Attila Girl at
08:42 PM
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Posted by: Sean Hackbarth at September 02, 2006 03:06 PM (RiZPJ)
2
Are you telling me there are women out there willing to admit they are wrong?
Tell me there are more like you! :-)
Posted by: Mark at September 02, 2006 05:08 PM (q0nS2)
3
She never said she admitted she was wrong.
Posted by: Sean Hackbarth at September 02, 2006 08:54 PM (RiZPJ)
4
BTW, does someone want to hire me as a proofreader? I did a great job, after all, on this post.
I implied to my readership that I was wrong. That leaves the question open of whether I admitted same to Attila the Hub.
This kind of butt-kissing is much harder when your husband is on a training regimen that limits his snacks to things like carrots sticks: "here, I'm going to make up with raw root vegetables." Something is lost, I fear.
Posted by: Attila Girl at September 02, 2006 09:26 PM (LEEsJ)
5
Maybe, based on your ability to deliver snacks, you should change the name of this blog to
"Snack Girl". LOL
Posted by: clyde at September 03, 2006 04:26 AM (6m+7s)
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