November 26, 2007

Jesus H. Chrysler, on a . . .

well, which is it? What would Jesus drive?

Naturally, I think Jesus was into the MoPar thing. His father's house has many mansions, presumably with a fair number of garages. And I suspect Chryslers are well-represented.

Via Fausta, and the Cotillion Mafia.

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November 24, 2007

Pray for Lebanon.

I'd like to see it change for good over there. And I'm starting to think they have a shot at pulling free of Syria.

Gateway Pundit has a nice summary.

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Traffic's Down.

This sounds like a good time to bleg. After all, with no one actually reading the thing, imagine what's happening to my morale. But remember: there's nothing wrong with me that some money and premium gin won't fix.

(Darrell, you're soooo off the hook, here: I'm directing this toward the gin/cash deadbeats out there, and they know who they are. I'm still doing fine on Damrak, but I'm low on No. 209 [amazing stuff from SF] and could use some more Citadelle. I was about to take the Cascade Mountain plunge, but got Junipero at the last minute, instead. I wouldn't mind some more Hendrick's, of course. I've lost my passion for Dry, which is a step above normal Beefeaters, but can't compete at the Citadelle/Junipero/209 level. These gins take the clear beauty of London dry gins and add just a bit more juniper, plus a little bit of 1-2 compatible botanicals [usually involving citrus peel]. The way to make a martini with these guys is to get some really clean, fresh ice, pour the gin atop, and say the word "vermouth" out loud. Nothing else is necessary; even adding an olive would be a crime with these gins.

I'm thinking of doing a three-way "shootout" between Junipero, No. 209, and Citadelle.)

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Well . . .

Don Henley's lawyer's apparently won't let me embed the video—but at least they let it stay up on YouTube, which is something.

Is this every conservative/libertarian's favorite Eagles song?

And now they're distributing their latest album through Wal-Mart, which just makes my little right-of-center heart go pitter-pat.

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Just Thought I'd "Claim" This Blog on Technorati.

Though goodness knows why; my profile over there is doing just fine without any intervention whatsoever. But I'm just feeling a bit blog-whorish today, so there you go.

Technorati Profile

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November 23, 2007

Bloody Canvas . . . Er, Kansas.

The Paul-Bots have broken free of the internet, and invaded the heartland.


Via American Princess.

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The Minnesota Blog-Plagiarist. Attn: SoCal Blogs!

That "Seventh Son" guy in Minnesota who's infamous for lifting people's blog-posts is now covering a story in Glendale, California (one town over from where I live). Did any of our local cohorts get ripped off here?

(The story sounds fishy, anyway: I'm sure the Fire Department coordinates with the cities so that trees are cut back within set guidelines, even for oak trees. And why would one hire a tree-trimming company out of Orange County to come all the way up here to the foothills, when they don't even know the local ordinances?)

Geez . . . what a scumbucket.

h/t: Laura, over at Ace's digs.

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More on Those Lights Going Out in Georgia . . .

I still love this song. I suppose I should download Reba's version on iTunes, and then I can hear it back-to-back with Vicki's on my iPod.

But of course I've never been able to figure out the time frame involved in the story: it starts in the evening, when Andy and his friend are having a drink at the bar, and in that same evening Andy gets killed, Dear Brother is arrested, a trial occurs, and the Sheriff/Judge still get home in time for supper.

It seem to me that unless there's a time machine involved, there had to be two nights which, cumulatively, led to the lights going out in Georgia (or at least—metaphorically—for the narrator's brother).

Which is better for the story arc, but not as good for the scanning of the lines in the chorus:

Those were the two nights that culminated in the lights going out in Georgia,

On the second of which they hung an innocent man,

So don't trust your soul—or, at least, the physical part of your being—to no backwoods Southern lawyer,

'Cause the Judge in the town has been corrupt and sloppy in the past, and after this incident he had blood on his hands, though not really in the same sense as Lady MacBeth did, and these ones might someday wash out.

Andyway, here are Vicki and Reba talking about the song—and then singing Reba's version. Reba has a better accent for it, and she does fabulous things with her eyes. On the other hand, she does flub the lyrics slightly.

Video clip via Janette.

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From the Carol Burnett Show . . .

Courtesy of Cassandra, now on blog-hiatus (no true blogger ever really quits for good; you know it, and I know it):

The funniest thing about that show was the fact that the actors kept losing their shit: it didn't feel like a lack of professionalism so much as a sort of good-natured expression of camaraderie among them. Of course, that means that the outtakes from the show are the best part.

And, yes: after asking the other Cotillion women, and checking out Vicki's website, we have indeed confirmed that the Vicki Lawrence from "The Carol Burnett Show" is the same one who originally performed "The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia."

She, Carol Burnett, Harvey Korman and Tim Conway are just the best: Comedy without a body count. Love it.

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So, What Do We Call Those Muslims (Or "Perverters of Islam," If You Prefer)

. . . who are trying to kill us?

Timothy Ash of The Guardian makes the linguistic case against "Islamofascists," and argues that "Islamists" describes those who advocate through peaceful means for repressive systems such as Sharia law, whereas the term "Jihadis" should be reserved for those who murder in Allah's name.

I've been using "fuckin' assholes," but I've been cautioned that this lacks precision.

h/t: Memeorandum.

UPDATE: Dr. D. suggests in the comments that all "real Muslims" believe everything in the Koran—in a very literal way. Does that mean that all real Christians believe that every word in the Bible is literally true? Does it mean all real Jews believe everything in the Torah is literally true? Because I have a few challenging passages for you, if that's the case.

Furthermore, Dr. D. would like to see this country "Muslim-frei." Not only do I not particularly want that—I find the very proposal scarier than the Jihadis, or whatever we've decided to call them.

But Brian Micklethwait seems to agree that it's the religion itself we need to denounce. I still don't see it: I'd rather wage war on a few hundred people who want to kill me, or a few thousand people who want to convert me by force, rather than a few billion who don't care one way or another what I'm doing and are perfectly indifferent to whether I wear shorts, or whether my gay friends are living with their boyfriends, or whether I believe that Jesus was, in fact, the Christ.

As for those who love to ironically discuss "the religion of peace," you enjoy that. Me, I'd like to know whether, in point of fact, "they will know we are Christians by our love." Not always, boys and girls. And I'm not discussing the Middle Ages here, either.

I'd like to clean my own house before I see to other faiths' own Reformations. And by that, I mean The House of Joy McCann. There is plenty to be done in it—physically, metaphorically, spiritually, emotionally.

And so I shall leave the religious wars to others. Have at it, kids.

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Always Nice To Get in Touch with Old Friends.

I sent a note to Dr. Prime:

When last we spoke, a year and a half ago, you were really getting into weed, chocolate, and eating pussy. How go all of the above?

Excellent. They always deliver. Although things are a bit slow in the pussy department right now. My girlfriend is in another state, and my wife has this whole "we're separated now" philosophy which has definitely cut down on availability.

And how are your kids and wife? And girlfriend?

Everyone's good. My out-of-state daughter is a kickass kid (she's 5 1/2 now) and I'm going to visit in a few weeks. My girlfriend is my best friend, and she also has really big breasts, so it works out great.

He still hasn't sent me the manuscript for his book, yet. I suppose I could simply "borrow" it from my friends' houses . . .

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Hackbarth,

on the Ron Paul phenomenon:

Most [Paul supporters] are normal people who live next to you, who go to the same supermarkets with you, and who send their children to the same schools. IÂ’m leaning towards Soren DaytonÂ’s belief that the Paul phenomenon is a protest vote. ItÂ’s a reaction to failures of Republicans to reduce the size and scope of government. ItÂ’s sort of like Pat Buchanan opposing President George H.W. Bush in 1992.

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Kathleen Willey's New Book

. . . may not be coming out at a particularly convenient time for Mrs. Clinton:

Mrs. Willey noted that Carl Bernstein wrote in his biography of Mrs. Clinton, "A Woman in Charge," that it "was not Clinton's philandering that bothered Hillary so much as her inability to control it," and that Mrs. Clinton has long been aware of her husband's wandering ways.

"Hillary has been hiring private investigators to scope out what Bill had been doing since he was governor," Ms. Willey said.

Other women — including Juanita Broaddrick, Gennifer Flowers and Paula Jones — have testified to Mr. Clinton's behavior as governor of Arkansas. That behavior exploded into crisis during the 1998 Lewinsky scandal, which ended with Mr. Clinton impeached by the House on charges of perjury and obstruction of justice, but acquitted by the Senate.

Mrs. Willey said that the Clinton administration's "damage control" operation consisted of private investigators keeping quiet the women with whom Mr. Clinton had supposed relations through intimidation, while influencing press coverage.

"It was hard to sit there and watch what the media was saying about me night after night" after her name became public during Kenneth W. Starr's independent counsel investigation of the Lewinsky scandal, she said.

"It was all untrue," she said. "It was a terrible smear campaign. There are bruises, believe me, but since I am a strong woman, I stayed strong."

Mrs. Willey says she received numerous threats — nails were driven in all four tires of her sport utility vehicle, her cat disappeared and a mysterious jogger near her Virginia home told her, "Hey, Kathleen. ... You are just not getting the message, are you?"

It was "a reign of terror," she said. "My car was vandalized; my children were threatened; I was threatened."

She sees all of this as part of a pattern.

"I think it's pretty obvious that she stuck with him because she had a 30-year plan to be president," Mrs. Willey said. "They are co-presidents. 'Buy one, get one free.' Clinton admitted this in the 1992 campaign."

As to Mrs. Clinton's playing what she calls "the gender card" in the current election campaign, Mrs. Willey said the former first lady is not an "advocate for feminism, but an advocate for one woman: Hillary Clinton."

Bill Clinton is one of the most talented politicians that has ever lived. But the idea of having him back in the White House—even as a First Spouse—really turns my stomach. Ironically, he may be his wife's greatest liability. And I'm not talking about his tomcatting, but rather the scorched earth tactics both Clintons used against their political opponents.

I wonder what it says in my FBI file. Ugh. The Clintons are very unattractive people.

Willey again:

"This is an important story for people to read, women in particular, and first-time voters who are considering [voting] for Hillary," she said. "This book will enlighten the public about what happened to me, and the kind of people we are dealing with: the Clintons."

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November 22, 2007

Happy Thanksgiving.

It must be time for Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.

The message: we are, in fact, our brothers' keepers. At least, to some degree. Or, as someone once observed of Mrs. Dalloway:

. . . She was one of the most thoroughgoing sceptics he had ever met, and possibly (this was a theory he used to make up to
account for her, so transparent in some ways, so inscrutable in
others), possibly she said to herself, As we are a doomed race,
chained to a sinking ship (her favourite reading as a girl was
Huxley and Tyndall, and they were fond of these nautical
metaphors), as the whole thing is a bad joke, let us, at any rate,
do our part; mitigate the sufferings of our fellow-prisoners
(Huxley again); decorate the dungeon with flowers and air-cushions;
be as decent as we possibly can. Those ruffians, the Gods, shan't
have it all their own way,—her notion being that the Gods, who
never lost a chance of hurting, thwarting and spoiling human lives
were seriously put out if, all the same, you behaved like a lady.

Or, for that matter, a gentleman. Steve Martin is brilliant in this movie. Go see it soon; it's time, and it still counts as Thanksgiving viewing if you see it before the end of November. (In my family, it would count if you watched it before March, but we tend to run late on these matters. We also take our Christimas decorations down by July 4th, whether we need to or not.)

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Glenn:

"People don't stop killers. People with guns do."

Via, well . . . Glenn.

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November 21, 2007

Sorry, Kitty-Cat.

I've been AWOL on our Afghanistan discussion (under the Camille Paglia post). I have client-itis, and I'll be back later.

You're making some great points, and I'll catch up over the long weekend, once I get the family disposed of. (Um. I didn't mean in shallow graves in my backyard, though, come to think of it . . . . )

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I <3 Brian May

Via Ace's news sidebar (his mini-blog, to the left of the main one) comes this little tidbit about Queen's sainted guitarist:

LONDON (Reuters) - Brian May, lead guitarist from rock band Queen who has just completed a doctorate in astrophysics, was on Monday named as the next chancellor to Liverpool John Moores University.

May, who will take up the role early next year, became an honorary fellow of the university earlier this year in recognition of his contribution to the arts and for encouraging public understanding of science with his book Bang! The Complete History of the Universe.

Three problems with the Reuters story: 1) that horrific dangling participle; 2) the egregious omission of the fact that—alone among the top guitarists of all time (Harrison didn't do it, Clapton didn't do it, Hendrix didn't do it; no one did it) May built the guitar he later played in concert for many years. He still has it; he still plays it. It's his signature. He fashioned it as a teenager, with his father's help in their workshop. (Maybe that was in their GARage, it being England and all.) He's not just a physicist; he's an amazing engineer.

And an underrated guitarist. Remember: before News of the World came out (or maybe it was The Game; I'll have to check), Queen produced sounds that were semi-orthodox for the time, but every other prog band was using synthesizers to do it. Queen's first five albums used no synthesizers at all. It was all Yankee British ingenuity, and Brian.

And 3) this:

"In this age of celebrity culture, it is rare to find someone who has fame, fortune and universal acclaim and yet who remains true to his core values of learning and enlightenment," said the university's vice chancellor Michael Brown.

The boys from Queen were all academics; even Freddie had studied visual arts formally. And they weren't alone in not checking their intellects at the door when they got into entertainment: after all, the guys from Monty Python and Beyond the Fringe are/were the same way.

Now if only someone would coax John Deacon back into the spotlight. Hermit Boy: your fans need you.

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November 20, 2007

I Know What You're Going To Say:

"Bookkeeping in general, is not out to get you. And neither is arithmetic in particular."

What do you know? Have you felt the mind rays emanating from the QuickBooks program? The palpable malice with which the calculator bombards me?

Note to self: resume wearing tinfoil hats to work.

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November 19, 2007

So, What Is To Be Done?

About the perils of PowerPoint?


(Via Martin G.)

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November 18, 2007

I Know; I'm Late.

But I love this 9/11 memorial ad by the folks at Budweiser.

I always mean to watch the Super Bowl, because of the ads, but I always forget. Also, I'd probably have to watch it on my own television: my husband hates having me around when there's football on TV. I always forget to check whether there is a play going on before I talk.

If I had TiVo, could I set it to record the Super Bowl, but only play the commercials? I mean, they are the best of the best—they almost always win the Clios. (And, no: I haven't been to the Clio Awards since I broke up with the guy from Rhythm & Hues. But I loved going to 'em, back in the day. I've been kissing up to all my friends who work at ad agencies, so it's just a matter of time.)

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