I just couldn't read you. Couldn't get around the way you used the word "cunt." Couldn't put up with "nigger."

But I know you touched a lot of lives, and I understand that you were a magical writer. And any friend of Juliette's is a friend of mine.

I wish you peace, and the God I believe in is flexible, so I have high hopes that if there is life after death, it's treating you a lot better than the one here did.

Be well.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 08:01 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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1 That's the second time you've said the c-word in a week! That is the only word in the english language that makes me uncomfortable. I feel like I did something bad just by reading it My one experience with reading gut rumblings was that I happened on his site when he was in rehab thanks to being called out on-line by his friends for being a drunk. While in rehab, he asked people to send letters to an old lady in there with him who was not receiving support from her family. That seemed pretty considerate of him, so I sent her some jokes, and the wife added some girly crap to lend support. We both felt pretty good for doing this tiny thing we did to help someone we didn't know. So I didn't know him, didn't really read him, but I'm glad he lived.

Posted by: Kevin at July 01, 2006 03:40 AM (++0ve)

2 I'm rather fond of the word "cunt," but I think some people overuse it. Applied to people, it's essentially a gender-specific form of "asshole," but I'm one of the few for whom it still has a sort of Anglo-Saxon eroticism, not unlike "fuck"--which remains the most versatile word in English. Acidman lost me when he published a huge screed against Venomous Kate, comparing her to his ex-wife, the "bloodless cunt." I could never get over the sense that he was a racist womanhater. But it appears I might be wrong.

Posted by: Attila Girl at July 01, 2006 06:47 AM (4IuF2)

3 You were right. And also wrong. An essentially contradictory nature.

Posted by: k at July 02, 2006 10:42 PM (y6n8O)

4 Well, that would explain the fact that he was attractive to women--we do, after all, love our lost, tortured souls. Bad boys are so Byronesque.

Posted by: Attila Girl at July 02, 2006 11:16 PM (4IuF2)

5 Yes. Ladies are painting their toenails red all over the world. Some have vowed to leave 'em red all summer. I was not a fan, myself. I followed along because of the blogwars and drama over Livey - i AM a fan, there. So I've been pondering all this, and the strangely powerful effect his passing away had on me. That resulted in my only two posts all week: http://ksquest.blogspot.com/2006/06/death-in-family.html http://ksquest.blogspot.com/2006/07/some-final-thoughts.html People who aren't raised in the South can develop a sort of stereotype mind-set about Southerners. That's a form of bigotry, of prejudice - which, of course, is part of the stereotype of the southerner. As always, those pre-judgements make them unaware of what great things they really ARE missing. Acidman was an intelligent and complex person; taking him at face value, as so many did, was silly. They lost. Big time.

Posted by: k at July 03, 2006 06:11 AM (wZLWV)

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. . . Joan riffs off one of my favorite ad campaigns of all time, "Real Men of Genius" with "Mr. Obscene Picture E-Mailer"—a worthy addition indeed.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 02:30 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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This has to be one of the funniest, sexiest articles I've ever read.

Damn, I love Hitch:

Stay with me. I've been doing the hard thinking for you. The three-letter "job," with its can-do implications, also makes the term [blowjob] especially American.

I'm married, but I've half a mind to send him some Johnny Walker Bluejob just for that illuminating read.

Via InstaDirtyOldMan.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 01:35 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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I know it seems sudden, but now he's fucking with Samuel Taylor Coleridge; I shall have to publicly de-link him. (While I'm at it, I may impugn his masculinity because of his stay-at-home-dad status, refer to him as a "failed academic" or some such, and put down his sweet, adorable son—but I haven't quite decided about that part.)

Posted by: Attila Girl at 11:53 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Even Coyne Maloney takes Bill Keller behind the woodshed for hiding behind the skirts of the Founding Fathers.

(Yeah. Washington, Jefferson, Adams, and Franklin wore skirts sometimes; a lot of people don't know about that, but they had to let their hair down somehow: they lived in stressful times. Who are you to judge?)

Posted by: Attila Girl at 11:02 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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. . . is very cautious about prescribing medicated skin creams. I believe he's afraid I'll somehow manage to dry them out, create powdered versions, and snort 'em.

Next thing you know, I'd be a Diprolene 'ho, and it would be all his fault.

But, no: he's saving me from that sort of existence.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 12:11 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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The people in Writer's Group seem quite surprised by the solution to my murder mystery, and not 100% dissatisfied, either.

I'm trying to get away from the type of chick-generated puzzle in which the crime was committed either by the sexist, or by the woman who likes to wear fur in public. Or the real estate developer: that's a subtle one.

Now all I have to do is finish this thing and then burn it send it to potential agents/publishers. Piece of cake.

I'll be 44 years old in a week and a half; I've got to get a move on.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 12:07 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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1 44? Most people that age are dead. I should know, I've been dead 20 years. 21 in November. Remember one thing: literary agents are nothing but failed writers who like to pass on their failures to others.

Posted by: clyde at July 01, 2006 06:06 AM (6m+7s)

2 Very encouraging; thanks

Posted by: Attila Girl at July 01, 2006 06:53 AM (4IuF2)

3 BTW, you CAN get a book published without a literary agent, and without having to pay for it yourself. Check out University presses. You get to keep the 15% and your book goes into the same stores. You just have to find a press that prints the kind of stuff you write. I did. My first royalty check is due in September. I plan to buy a new bathmat and maybe a shower curtain.

Posted by: clyde at July 01, 2006 06:58 AM (6m+7s)

4 What's it about?

Posted by: Attila Girl at July 01, 2006 07:13 AM (4IuF2)

5 Baseball at the turn of the century, written in a sort of tongue-in-cheek style. It's the story of my late great uncle who played major league ball between 1911-1919, as a spitball pitcher with the Braves, Cubs and Phillies, and was teammates with the original Cy Young. I included lots of newspaper clips from the era to show what it was like to be alive, play professional baseball, and live in an enormously-changing America. The book is titled "Spitting on Diamonds" and is available at stores near you or on Amazon.com See? Ask a question, get a commercial.

Posted by: clyde at July 01, 2006 08:06 AM (6m+7s)

6 Oh, it was published by the University of Missouri Press.

Posted by: clyde at July 01, 2006 08:07 AM (6m+7s)

7 And sometimes literary agents just happen upon your blog and tell you to send your novel. Trust me, you never know who's reading.

Posted by: Joan at July 05, 2006 05:14 PM (wZLWV)

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Is Reynolds in danger, someday, of becoming a dirty old man?

Posted by: Attila Girl at 11:59 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
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1 Ummm...you have to ask?

Posted by: I R A Darth Aggie at June 30, 2006 04:21 AM (1hM1d)

2 Becoming? Where have you been?

Posted by: CGHill at June 30, 2006 12:04 PM (K53mr)

3 Let's see. He lives in a Red state, so he must be

Posted by: William Teach at June 30, 2006 12:48 PM (IRsCk)

4 Just because you're old doesn't make you dirty. Or maybe it does. Let me look at that picture again...

Posted by: clyde at July 01, 2006 07:21 AM (6m+7s)

5 Well, I don't regard him as old, exactly--but the man does love him some eye candy.

Posted by: Attila Girl at July 01, 2006 11:21 AM (4IuF2)

6 I'm failing to see the issue

Posted by: William Teach at July 01, 2006 02:09 PM (doAuV)

7 We have to get those naked Lefties out of our mind. You know the ones. The ones always referring to their 'bush' and while their breasts cascade over five rolls of stomach fat...There ought to be a law.

Posted by: Darrell at July 01, 2006 07:40 PM (olr1J)

8 Are the lefties constantly referring to their "bush" the ones in San Francisco? The ones holding up signs reading "Breasts, not bombs" while going topless to protest the war? LOL That has to be the dumbest thing yet. Especially when you see the women, using the word "women" loosely, at best. Hairy armpits, de rigeur.

Posted by: Clyde at July 03, 2006 03:15 AM (6m+7s)

9 I'll have you know that when I wasn't shaving my legs or my armpits I still looked quite fetching. And I have the photos to prove it . . . somewhere.

Posted by: Attila Girl at July 03, 2006 08:40 AM (4IuF2)

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I have a few on my blogroll; they're mostly written by people I know. But I could use a few more. Every time I find one, it either goes bad or has its comments section taken over by silly people.

Send me your favorites—not from an anthropological perspective, but rather an intellectual one.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 07:14 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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I'm getting to the point where in order to keep track of all my contacts, clients and prospects, I need to set up a small database.

Has to work on a PowerBook. Has to be user-friendly. Has to be non-threatening to English majors.

I'd also like it to peel grapes for me, but that's probably asking a bit much.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 01:31 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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The instant you say to yourself, "oh, wait: I'm a total running dog these days."

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"Do you have anything to eat?" I ask her. "I want salad."

"No problem," she tells me.

"I had a fight with Attila the Hub. Let's hate men for a while."

"I'm not sure I can do that," she responds. "But if I really concentrated, I could probably resent your father for a few minutes."

"Don't. After all, he put some nice semen in you, with cool DNA. And now you have two nice kids. Excuse me: one nice kid, and one repressed workaholic. However, the one who's nice is really nice."

Posted by: Attila Girl at 12:58 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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I'm over my PMS.

That's the main problem with perimenopause: When I had actual cycles, I could predict the point at which temporary insanity would descend upon me. Now I freak out first, and find out why afterward.

Of course, that just makes me more interesting, colorful, and fun to be around. (Read: a total cunt. That happens to be my own version of the Marabel Morgan approach: a lot less sugar, a lot more spice.)

Posted by: Attila Girl at 11:34 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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In a sur-prise move, the Yemeni "President" is going to stay in office, after all.

Meanwhile, those who are agitating for democracy continue to face imprisonment and the threat of death.

Jane's one-woman campaign to bring attention to the situation in Yemen fills me with grief for its people and gratitude that she has the stomach to keep going. As usual, her observations are worth reading.

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Who knew she was a 'head? Well, my friend Mikal knew. Apparently, so did Taylor Hill at jambands.com.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 11:44 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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1 Fake! AC can't even name a favorite album or concert date. Really seems like she's trying to connect to something she really has no idea about. Even so, the dead were the world's worst excuse for a band. Had she said she was a Nick Cave groupie, well...

Posted by: Pete Moss at June 27, 2006 04:19 PM (W1KqT)

2 She knows! That's a JOKE (hint:secondhand smoke from burning "unknown" substances at Dead concerts and it's effects on memory). She's posted pictures of herself at G-D concerts(including a 1990 concert in Germany) on her website before. She's even talked about it at length in the past.

Posted by: Darrell at June 27, 2006 09:06 PM (8TYF5)

3 No way Pete. She named her favorite songs, and they are by and large the Dead's best songs, although not the ones that a non-fan would have chosen (they aren't the most popular). The fact that she knows how horrible the 'space' thing is to those of us not on acid is the clincher. She's a dead head. Dead-head conservatives are not all that uncommon. We just don't take a lot of acid, so we don't stick out as much

Posted by: Kevin at June 28, 2006 03:26 AM (++0ve)

4 I'm pretty soft-core myself, though I do own a Stoney the Bear doll, and I am wearing a GD T-shirt (I use 'em as sleepwear).

Posted by: Attila Girl at June 28, 2006 07:59 AM (4IuF2)

5 Hah! I haven't purposefuilly listened to the Dead in probably a year. Ever since your post, I have listened to nothing but. Row, Jimmy. Row. Man, that song makes me pine for the days of high school. And weed. Weird that we outgrew one, and not the other

Posted by: Kevin at June 28, 2006 07:10 PM (++0ve)

6 Can a person even get decent acid these days? I suppose that's a dumb question for me since I've never had the opportunity to try it, and wouldn't know good from bad. Not that after my "fungal" experience I'd be terribly inclined to try it in the first place.

Posted by: Desert Cat at June 29, 2006 10:26 PM (xdX36)

7 Well, the advantage of LSD over shrooms—as I understand it—is that with acid one can control the dosage a bit better, and of course that's important with something as intense as tripping. I've never done shrooms, but my rules with acid were: 1) only when you're in a good mood; 2) have someone around who isn't doing it—to order food, interface with the outside world, handle medical emergencies, etc. I had nothing but pleasant experiences, and I've got zero desire to ever do it again.

Posted by: Attila Girl at June 30, 2006 10:23 AM (4IuF2)

8 one can control the dosage a bit better jiminy christmas did you hit the nail on the head! It was fascinating and quite incredible, but I never want to go there again.

Posted by: Desert Cat at June 30, 2006 07:18 PM (xdX36)

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Hackbarth takes the ACLU to task over its rather predictable—and unsupported—spin on the NY Times' shocking revelations that Western governments (including ours!) are trying to starve Al Qaeda of funds.

As Sean points out, the only thing shocking about it is the fact that the folks at the Gray Lady thought our enemies should know the details about how this is done.

Next thing you know, Big Brother is going to be asking us how much money we make, and where we get it. Oh, wait . . .

Posted by: Attila Girl at 06:17 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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It's so pretty right now, and relatively cool. I may actually go for a walk before church.

I woke up early, so I'll probably resort to a nap this afternoon. But at the moment, all is well: the birds are singing in the yard, and living in La Canada is like being at summer camp—all year 'round. Nothing but trees everywhere I look.

And the crows—those noisy beasts—are quiet right now. Still no owls, though. Am I supposed to buy my own? Did the city fail to send me a memo?

Will blog for owls. Or Wols; either way.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 06:07 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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1 I could send you a few buzzards. They are just like Owls, other than they are huge, ugly, and stink. The same way that the NYT resembles honest media. (Was that impolite?)

Posted by: old_dawg at July 01, 2006 07:14 PM (Si1mC)

2 Yes. But in the good way

Posted by: Attila Girl at July 01, 2006 09:31 PM (4IuF2)

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Insty has a good roundup on the current Kos-TNR dustup, and the TownhallTownhouse-list scandal.

Somehow, the whole thing makes my head hurt, although it's always nice to watch the leftist fringe self-destruct. How funny that "people power" translates into "march in lockstep with me."

Posted by: Attila Girl at 10:58 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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. . . is staying in tonight.

She does not seem too happy about it, though.

I can relate to the idea that if someone suddenly sounds like Ace, that would be a turn-on. What is it about that guy, anyway?

Nonetheless, I maintain that there's nothing wrong with Feisty a Hitachi Magic Wand wouldn't cure.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 09:44 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Martin Peretz writes:

It feels a bit demeaning to defend oneself against Kos. But I am one of the neo-con owners, and I am titular editor-in-chief. So here goes . . .

So I guess they aren't quite the Hard Righties Kos is making them out to be. Fun times.

Via Protein Wisdom.

Posted by: Attila Girl at 10:10 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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