. . . should go on Oakland Jeff's gravestone when he dies.

From The Simple Life: Fallujah:

PARIS: Hi guys. We just came from Ramallah.

NICOLE: They hated us. We got fired from the intifada.

PARIS: So. What do you guys do for fun in Fallujah?

INSURGENTS: Behead the infidel!

PARIS & NICOLE: Niiiiice.

LEADER: I am Mohammed Mohammed. (points to drooling mongoloid) This is Mohammed³. He will achieve martyrdom after you perform ritual shaving of the anus.

The whole thing is note-freaking-perfect. Jeff knows his low art.

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. . . build a small shrine to her in a corner of the living room. My husband wouldn't mind, I don't think.

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While I was out of town earlier this month, two of my favorite bloggers got into a minor war. Of all people, Allahpundit emerged (for a time, at least) as the voice of reason and moderation. How often does that happen?

The original issue, as I understand it, had to do with Lt. Gen. James Mathis' infamous off-the-cuff remarks:

"Actually it's quite fun to fight them, you know. It's a hell of a hoot," Mattis said, prompting laughter from some military members in the audience. "It's fun to shoot some people. I'll be right up there with you. I like brawling.

"You go into Afghanistan, you got guys who slap women around for five years because they didn't wear a veil," Mattis said. "You know, guys like that ain't got no manhood left anyway. So it's a hell of a lot of fun to shoot them."

Faced with the Patterico-Andrea Harris kerfuffle, many bloggers stepped quietly away, muttering to themselves about how they were late for an appointment, or needed to wash their hair, or tweeze their eyebrows, or . . . something.

Which is exactly what I would have done.

For what it's worth, the dispute—for many—appeared to hinge on whether one thought the term wife-beating meant exactly that, or whether it was a euphemism for the misogynistic streak in many Islamists, often expressed by brutal murders. That is: does wife beating mean wife beating, or does is it shorthand for "killing women whose ankles we once glimpsed, or who were the victims of rape"?

I tend toward the latter interpretation myself, and wonder whether Patterico's legal training might have lent him a teensy blind spot, a small sliver of literal-mindedness. Though I certainly laud his mental discipline in evaluating a statement on the basis of what's in that statement: a good thing in most cases.

I'm glad I try to steer clear of blog wars. They are good for one's traffic, but not necessarily good for one's soul.

Personally, I'd love it if we all spoke to one another as if they were standing there in front of us in a friend's family room, and everyone had a Diet Coke, glass of wine, beer, or snack in his/her hand.

Yup: I'm a regular hippie chick most of the time.

And, by the way: it would be great if we could steer clear both of lethal threats and of legal action against one another. Together: Kumbayah, my Lord, Kumbayah . . . .

[Dons kevlar vest, and runs, zigzag-style, toward the nearest cover.]

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