She doesn't like talking about her family; just other people's.

Fausta has her own article up on The New York Times sliming of Cindy McCain.

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Are we ready to elect a couple of guttersnipes to the White House? Has it really come to that? Sam Schulman of The Weekly Standard assures us that those dirty Republicans won't win—can't win. The social order will not be overcome by a couple of shabby nonconformists:

CLASS WILL TELL:

Why is Bill Ayers a respectable member
of the upper middle class,
and Sarah Palin contemptible?

Pour yourself a Johnnie Walker Black and remember. The presidential campaign was going to be about sex—the sex of the inevitable winning candidate. Then it was going to be about race. We dreamed we would atone for slavery and the Berlin Airlift, impress Europe and charm the Arab world. But the undecided voters who will determine the winner are no longer interested in race or sex. They are looking at social class. Which ticket best expresses the values and tastes of the upper-middle-class—and captivates the rest of us who follow the lead of the upper-middles?

It is, according to his theory, quite anxiety-making. We were already hamstrung by having a member of the military at the head of the ticket: and then we brought this stubborn trailer trash from the last frontier into the mix. I have started biting my fingernails.

Scheiber spoke to various people from Palin's past, all of whom have two things in common: Every one of them is smarter than Palin and none of them has been heard of since their encounter with her. Scheiber's pet specimen among what he calls "the more urbane members of the community" is a Dartmouth graduate who reads Civil War histories, self-published a book, and not only does but "savors" the New York Times crossword puzzle. This sort of résumé wouldn't get your niece an unpaid internship on L Street—but for a Rhodes Scholar lost in Alaska, the Dartmouth degree, the Civil War buffery, the Times crossword puzzle all take on huge significance. Unable to comprehend how Palin could have outpaced the Wasilla gentry, poor Scheiber clings for dear life to these sad fragments of class dignity.

While Palin threatens class solidarity, Obama is emollient. The more urbane members of the Hyde Park community are cleverer than their Wasilla counterparts and believe that they have captured Obama for their class--just as Richard Stern persuades himself that the still-radical couple he dines with are merely Unitarians in a hurry. But the man who may be president is cleverer still.

Obama and his surprising choice for vice president have spent most of their career working on their own images, smoothing out the rough edges, trying out devices, rhetorical and cosmetic, to make the nicer sort of people feel comfortable with them. Obama wrote his own life, and then wrote it again; Biden practiced for years in front of a mirror to overcome his childhood stutter. Carefully composed, Obama holds the upper-middle class in his steady hands, and has no need of Stern's help to assure our anxious electorate that he will not shock their class sensibilities.

The Republicans, alas, are stuck with this election's true and unrepentant revolutionaries. McCain and Palin have each refused, by sheer cussedness, to fulfill the social expectations of others. This may make them poison to undecideds who suffer, more than most, from class anxiety. But do not despise the undecideds. Even conservatives can contract Scheiber Syndrome. Think of David Brooks, Christopher Buckley, David Frum, Peggy Noonan, and George Will. The symptoms? Curiously amplified, obsessively repeated, sometimes elaborately stage-whispered doubts about the Republican ticket.

There is no cure, but there is an etiology. All share a dreadful secret—their writing is driven by an anxiety to be tastemakers to the gentry, not merely thinkers and entertainers. There is nothing more anxious-making than striving to create taste for the classes, not masses, or even to keep up with it. (The struggle to do so is etched in the lines of Tina Brown's face.)

But what the classes think is a matter to which the GOP standard-bearers are sadly but nobly indifferent.

Because, of course, McCain and Palin, according to Schulman, just do not know their place. My emphasis in the second quote.

This entire phenomenon will leave the upwardly mobile middle-class reaching for its valium (or its muffins) as the rest of this unfolds. Because it turns out there are a lot of working people out there, and all this time, they've been breeding. If McCain and Palin win, we don't just pass up our chance to atone for slavery: we do something far, far more serious.

We upset the cultural apple-cart. We take power away from the Costco shoppers and give it to the Wal-Mart customers.

This cannot stand. Read the whole wry essay: it's pure gold. At least, my father will get a bitter laugh out of it. Though he likes Sarah Palin's legs. If my stepmom isn't looking, gosh knows whom he'll vote for.

Had things gone the way Dick Morris thought they would: had this year brought us a Condi Rice/Hillary Clinton choice, my father's head might have exploded.

h/t: Memeorandum.

UPDATE: Darleen responds:

At her home blog, and

At the Protein Wisdom Pub

She's all like, "your trackbacks aren't working."
And I'm all, like, "I'm not sure they ever did."

I guess I should check with Pixy about that—at least when we update the site this fall.

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"It ain't over till it's over."

Fortunately for his campaign, McCain does not trail by so large a margin as that which Humphrey and Ford had to overcome. Indeed, McCain's challenge is not dissimilar to that which faced Truman in the final weeks of the 1948 campaign--that is, overcoming a 5-point or so lead against a relatively unknown and aloof opponent who seems assured of victory.

McCain, like Truman, is burdened by an unpopular administration of his own party, though, in contrast to Truman, he has some chance of disassociating himself from it. Somewhat like Truman in 1947 and 1948, McCain has been preoccupied with foreign policy at a time when economic issues have seized the headlines. Many pundits in 1948 said that the New Deal era was about to end, just as some have said recently that the Reagan-Thatcher era will soon be over. Truman proved the pundits wrong in 1948 . . .

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"It ain't over till it's over."

Fortunately for his campaign, McCain does not trail by so large a margin as that which Humphrey and Ford had to overcome. Indeed, McCain's challenge is not dissimilar to that which faced Truman in the final weeks of the 1948 campaign--that is, overcoming a 5-point or so lead against a relatively unknown and aloof opponent who seems assured of victory.

McCain, like Truman, is burdened by an unpopular administration of his own party, though, in contrast to Truman, he has some chance of disassociating himself from it. Somewhat like Truman in 1947 and 1948, McCain has been preoccupied with foreign policy at a time when economic issues have seized the headlines. Many pundits in 1948 said that the New Deal era was about to end, just as some have said recently that the Reagan-Thatcher era will soon be over. Truman proved the pundits wrong in 1948 . . .

Posted by: Attila Girl at 05:53 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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"It ain't over till it's over."

Fortunately for his campaign, McCain does not trail by so large a margin as that which Humphrey and Ford had to overcome. Indeed, McCain's challenge is not dissimilar to that which faced Truman in the final weeks of the 1948 campaign--that is, overcoming a 5-point or so lead against a relatively unknown and aloof opponent who seems assured of victory.

McCain, like Truman, is burdened by an unpopular administration of his own party, though, in contrast to Truman, he has some chance of disassociating himself from it. Somewhat like Truman in 1947 and 1948, McCain has been preoccupied with foreign policy at a time when economic issues have seized the headlines. Many pundits in 1948 said that the New Deal era was about to end, just as some have said recently that the Reagan-Thatcher era will soon be over. Truman proved the pundits wrong in 1948 . . .

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Iowahawk has the official graphic, and a link to the bumper sticker-sized logo. He reminds us that we need to produce these ourselves and tape 'em to our cars (or go to an office supply store, get blank bumper stickers, and print them out on that, if we want to get fancy).

The idea is that until or unless Joe Wurzelbacher sets up a PayPal account and we can send "every last red cent" of the proceeds to him, no one should be profiting off of the way the media has been persecuting this man.

Works for me!

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I love money. It's always the right color. It always fits.

And, now--to find the cheapest housing I can in Henderson/Vegas/etc.!

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plays the Eliza Doolittle card.

I got a better one: a very special ace:

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Here's Ace on "elite" vs. "establishment." Sounds like the kind of crap people pull on Angelenos every fucking day. We just yawn.

Okay, look: there are a few different ways to determine what constitutes "class" in America.

1) E.B. "Aren't Jews outside the class system, anyway?" Um, okay. Whatevs. Yawn.

2) "Who is the most intelligent? Let's reward that." Sure. Because either you were born that way, or you were given a certain level of stimulation very early on in life. That's so to your credit.

Bite me. Yawn.

3) People who were born to a certain level—defined not so much by education or financial security, but by being able to tell who manufactured a particular piece of silver without looking at the marque.

Yawn.

4) Adhering to a code of conduct which maintains that all people are equal, no matter what the externals might indicate. (This happens to be the only type of class I really recognize, personally, and it's the reason I shop in Beverly Hills: because no one ever looked at my mother funny when we shopped there together, however frayed her sweatshirts were. Their motivations might not have been pure, but they were doing the right thing.)

5) Money as a measure of class. It ain't perfect, but it's more egalitarian than any other measurement, because in this country you can always get some, if you want it badly enough.

6) "Well. At least I don't live in the Los Angeles area; I'm from New York." Okey-doke.

Yawn.

7) "Well. At least I don't live in the Los Angeles area; I'm from San Francisco." Fine. Sounds good to me. Goodness; look at the time! Yawn.

My father is fond of telling me that he's a "elite" because he subscribes to the New Yorker. No, really: He's not quoting Freakaoid he sort of means it.

"On the other hand," I tend to counter. "I read books. And I finish some of 'em."

It's like shooting fish in a fuckin' barrel. I could use a bigger barrel.

"Class." "Elite." Please define your terms. I'm going to bed.

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She's so perfect. It's blue. It has a V6. I'm with her parents after dinner, gushing about how well she'll come along, and which colleges might be good matches for her.

"Oh, gosh." (And this is only after two glasses of chianti, mind you.) "What if I'd ended up with her sister? I love them both, but I couldn't have handled that."

"Oh, I knew." Her mom grins. "I'm set that one up okay. I'm not as out of it as one might think."

She's travelling for the election, too. But they are making her go farther, because she has a law degree. I only have to go to Nevada.

Informal tally: among the adults at the table, three out of five voted for Clinton the first time around; most of us switched in 1996. Those of us (I mean, them) who were old enough had voted for . . . Carter.

We spend the evening talking about belief systems. "I don't believe in UFOs," I explain. "But I do believe in God. And, um, the big monster girl . . . Nettie?"

"Nessie," CalTech Girl finsishes.

"Right. You know how I am with nouns. That's what I meant. And the other creature. The one with the breasts. I believe in that one."

"Sasquatch?"

"That's what I said, isn't it?"

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Two attorneys, two science teachers (high school level, college level). And my sponsee into the church, who is one of the few bright spots in my life—and with whom I should spend much more time.

"Have you seen An American Carol?" my sponsee asks, brightly.

"Oh, yes. I have. As a matter of fact, I'm sort of known as being a . . . [looking around at CalTech Girl, gesturing wildly, in an I-don't-have-the-vocabulary sort of way] an enthusiastic, pi . . . ."

"—cheerleader." CTG finishes.

"Right." I add. "I, um. I liked the movie. I thought lots of people should see it."

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I'm normally against anything that smacks of blackmail, but, like Ace, I'm getting tired of the media getting a "pass" while they slime private citizens.

Just as (like Instapundit always insists) citizens should have a right to videotape cops who are videotaping them, journalists who essentially put people on trial for asking questions of politicians should themselves be "vetted."

I mean Joe the Plumber vetted. I mean Paula Jones vetted.

Vetted.

Update: Morrissey weighs in.

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As Dave Burge points out, a vote for Obama is a vote for civility.

Go brownshirts!

But, you protest—you wanted fresh Iowahawk? Here you go! The sweet, and the sour . . .

"I Am Joe"

I AM JOE

. . .[A] pre-emptive apology for the intentional non-humor to follow. I promise that all future non-humor will be strictly unintentional . . . .

We've all witnessed a lot of insanity in American politics over the last few years. Up until the last few days, none of it has seriously bothered me; hey, just more grist for the satire mill. But after witnessing the media's blitzkreig on Joe 'the Plumber' Wurzelbacher, I can only muster anger, and no small amount of fear.

Politicians—Sarah Palin, Bill Clinton, et al.—obviously have to put up with some rude, nasty shit, but it's right there in the job description. Joe the Plumber is different. He was a guy tossing a football with his kid in the front yard of his $125,000 house when a politician picked him out as a prop for a 30-second newsbite for the cable news cameras. Joe simply had the temerity to speak truth (or, if you prefer, an uninformed opinion) to power, for which the politico-media axis apparently determined that he [had to] be humiliated, harassed, smashed, destroyed. The viciousness and glee with which they set about the task ought to concern anyone who still cares about citizen participation, and freedom of speech, and all that old crap they taught in civics class before politics turned into Narrative Deathrace 3000, and Web 2.0 turned into Berlin 1932.0.

Godwin's Law! you say? if the jackboot fits, wear it.

If it's meta-memes and meta-meta-narratives these media headlice want, so be it.

I hope you will join me in expressing a simple bit of solidarity with this guy, Spartacus style. I AM JOE. I am a Wal-Mart schlub in flyover country who changes my own oil and unclogs drains without a license. I smoke and drink beer and toss the football in the front yard with my kid, and I figure I can [find] my way without handouts from some Magic Messiah's candy bags. Most everyone in my family and most everyone I grew up with is another Joe, and if you screw with them, you screw with me.

Are you a Joe? Say it proud. Leave it on every goddamn newspaper comment section and online forum. Let these pressroom and online thugs know you won't stay silent when they try to destroy the life of a private citizen for speaking his mind.

My emphasis.

The comparison I keep thinking of is Paula Jones, who also got slimed for "not knowing her place." When Americans are supposed to know their "stations" in life—and defer to politicians/media bigwigs—we have lost everything this country was supposed to stand for. We have got ourselves an Old-World style class system. And if you'll excuse another "hoochie-mama" moment: Fuck that noise.

I am a lifelong Angeleno whose family is from Nebraska farm country—and Michigan/Virginia on the other side. My hometown is Whittier, California, from the old days when it was an agricultural town. My ancestry sports both Mayflower refugees and a few Osage Indians. I'm married, childless, and not nearly as good at cars as Dave—though I do clear the drains and toilets in my home. (Because it doesn't take much finesse: just stubbornness, enthusiasm, and a willingness to bleach the entire room down afterward, given how physically clumsy I am, and how obsessive-compulsive.)

I'm overeducated, yet degree-free, and chronically underemployed due to my 'tude and a certain literal-minded "frustrated engineer" quality in my brain that renders me hopelessly impractical some of the time.

I'm a chronically depressed writer/editor.

And I am Joe, too. If people with college degrees and more original art in their homes want to look down on me, they are welcome to: I'll be on the porch with a cigar and a martini.

Need a palate-cleanser? Cool.

You say you still prefer your Iowahawk funny? Okay. Vaya con Dios.

—Joe

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I don't know who wants to be publicly acknowledged, so I'll just use first names. Thanks to Kevin , Joseph, David, Richard, Darrell, Marion, and Cathryn, it's about 75% certain that I'll be able to make it to Nevada. I'll pick up the gasoline costs myself, and the blogging readership has paid for two night in the local Super 8 Motel.

Again: They want me to go for a full ten days, but I might not be able to afford more than 4-7 days.

Keep the funds rolling in: I'll be able to do more "get out the vote" activities if I can go out early.

And thank you. I know the mainstream media will want to call the whole election before the polls have even closed on the West Coast, but if we take Nevada, they won't be able to do it.

The longer the media wait to start "deciding" things that are not in their purview to decide, the more people show up. The more people show up, the closer we come to the democratic ideal.

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It's good to be Queen. Especially in Ohio.

I just hope there are enough observers at the polls to dampen the instances of fraud in this election--because the accusations will be flying from both sides. No matter who wins.

Shine, perishing Republic.

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BUMPED: Still a few hundred shy of my goal! Scroll down for new posts.

I just heard from the Nevada organizers, and they'd like me to come out and act as a poll observer, to keep things fair, and/or assist with their "get out the vote" effort.

I can manage this if I stay at a Motel 6 (or the equivalent), and if I can get $20-$40 from each of my regular readers.

I know that you all know I'm broke. I'm willing to contribute my time, but I'll need your help with housing and gasoline.

I eat next to nothing when I'm doing political travel, and since I'm driving out there I can load the car up with cheap snacks: apples and Luna bars have worked well when I'm playing "Girl Reporter." They'll also work fine for long days of getting out the vote (they tell me I may be at it for 10-12 hours a day). And I'll drink some milk each day, and take my vitamins.

But I cannot do this unless I raise $500-$700 from readers over the next week. (The more you give, the longer I can stay. They'd like me for ten days, but if I can stay there for a week it'll still help them out enormously.)

This is the most important election in a very long time—for economic reasons as much as for national security reasons. So please hit my tip jar, and send me out into the desert.

Thank you!

UPDATE: Bumped; I'm only halfway there, so keep those donations rolling in. No, I'm not going out there if I have to sleep in my car. Not in the high desert. If McCain loses Nevada and you didn't send me out there . . . well, you wouldn't want that on your conscience, now, would you? (Bumping this back up.)

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1 Okay, I chipped in. If you wind up not going to Nevada, spend it on gin with my blessings.

Posted by: Gordon at October 16, 2008 08:33 PM (52nKX)

2 Gregory, you can contribute as much as you'd like-no laws to consider here. You don't even have to use those fake names like Will Good and Ixvbdf. In fact, don't. PayPal, unlike the Democratic Party, has rules and standards. Ask all your friends to join the fun. Spread the word throughout all of Asia. It just might keep the economic miracle alive.

Posted by: Darrell at October 17, 2008 11:27 PM (XHJjx)

3 Or Mickey Mouse, eh, Darrell? Yeah, since I didn't hear back from Attila herself, I went ahead and hit the tipjar. But I'm still waiting for the pot sweetener [hint, hint]. PS Does anyone else notice the chequerboard pattern she uses in her comment boxes? Because I can't really see it on my LCD screen...

Posted by: Gregory at October 18, 2008 06:30 AM (N8lCm)

4 The checkerboard pattern shows in IE 7. It's doesn't appear when using Firefox 3.0.3. "Your new tax plan is going to tax me more, isn't it?" the plumber asked, complaining that he was being taxed "more and more for fulfilling the American dream." It's not that I want to punish your success," Obama responded. "I just want to make sure that everybody who is behind you, that they've got a chance for success too ... I think when you spread the wealth around, it's good for everybody." "So instead of cutting taxes with a kitchen knife we'll butter it up with wealth and spread it around like we earned it," the Democratic candidate continued. "It's a patented foreign blend that is guaranteed to help improve my standing in the polls, but it's made with 100% pure American taxpayer sweat, which once again shows how taxes can be patriotic." When asked to clarify how exactly this plan was going to work, Obama, who is currently ahead in the polls, explained that it was "quite simple: everyone will be contributing according to his abilities and consuming according to his needs, while special observers will be making sure that a worker's contribution does not go above or below the approved list of his abilities. Special distributors will also be making sure that a worker's needs do not exceed the quota based on the availability of the WealthSpread™ formula." "And, of course, there will also be watchers who will watch these watchers, and the watchers who will watch those watchers, and so on - leading to a full guaranteed employment for everybody." "What's not to vote for?" Obama finished as he was cheered on by a group of supporters wearing blue pins with the Obama logo and the words "Journalists for Obama." http://thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=2417

Posted by: Darrell at October 18, 2008 12:11 PM (aMI3H)

5 Asking for money from your community, very socialist of you Attila. What ever happened to personal responsibility. Taking care of yourself, every chance you get you are ready for a handout, just like the banks, just like the special interest groups, nice example you are setting here. Just kidding, I'll pitch in. Azmat

Posted by: Azmat Hussain at October 23, 2008 12:01 PM (ZVMDn)

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Ace meditates on is various possible permutations, racial and not.

Two nights ago I was in Old Town Pasadena, and a guy with a clipboard in his hand was looking for prey, so I kept my head down; I wasn't in the mood. But he made eye contact with another guy closer to his age—some 20-something hipster and asked brightly, "would you like to register for Obama?"

"Already working for him," the other kid replied. By then I was safely past, but I couldn't help but wonder whether Kid #2 is an Obama supporter at all, or whether he's discovered that this is the best way to gracefully disengage from such encounters.

I don't think that anyone who lives on either Coast, or in a college town, is going to be shouting it to the rooftops that they're voting for someone who has an "R" after his or her name.

And I think the polls are more meaningless in this particular election than they usually are, which is saying quite a lot.

Hey—have I mentioned lately that the Log Cabin Republicans are endorsing McCain, who refuses to allow gay-baiting in his campaign?

Meanwhile, the PUMAs are on the prowl; they may not want to be confrontational with their friends, but I don't think they're big fans of the misogyny in the Democratic party.

And there are plenty of black people who are voting with their brains—not their melanin.

Remember the story of the Florida panhandle in the 2000 election: voters in that second Fla time zone didn't bother showing up, because the media called the state for Gore before the polls closed in the panhandle. Had all the panhandle voters showed up, Florida never would have been disputed, and the nation wouldn't have had to suffer through "Bush v. Gore," the Supreme Court having to step in, the cries of "Hail to the Thief," and "He's Not My President." All that angst, all the drama. So unnecessary.

Vote. No matter what you read on the internet, see on television, or hear on the radio. No matter what state is called for whom. Just vote, vote, vote.

YOU ARE THE FLORIDA PANHANDLE; VOTE!

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for animation aficionados, and
Freakazoid! fans in particular.

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What a surprise.

I'm sure we'll be hearing an apology from the mainstream media and from Barack Obama himself (after all, he brought it up in the debate last night). But he'll be wearing his "Sarah Palin Is a Cunt" T-Shirt, so I may find myself doubting his sincerity.

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