I mean, I love the song. But the substance is a pathetic excuse for a recreational drug.

Someone on Twitter was just complaining about its after-effects, and the very thought made me take an antihistamine in sympathy.

I mean, I don't care how good it would supposedly make you feel: would you douche with alien-blood? Of course not: concentrated acid in the vagina = bad.

Well, then: why would you snort coke?

And, yes: I did try it once, it in 1980s. It achieved nothing. And why would it? I mean, under normal circumstances, I don't need something to bring me up. I need whatever it takes to knock me out, so I stand a chance of sleeping that night. Coke does the opposite of what a drug ought to do, while irritating one's nasal passages. Two birds with one stone: attacks a vulnerable body part while making it impossible to sleep. What is the upside supposed to be?

Okay. I'm done. For now.

(Attila the Hub: "Do you know the effect alcohol can have on the liver?"

"Yes," I respond. "But it's okay, because I gave up all other substances that are hard on the liver, like Tylenol. Also, I don't have to watch the damage occur. Also, there is no such thing as the cocaine equivalent of a nice little glass of red wine, loaded with antioxidants. The stuff has no legitimate use whatsoever."

To his credit, he did not roll his eyes before resuming reading his book.)

Posted by: Attila Girl at 10:02 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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