"What I meant was that I was against drilling in ANWR as long as there was one Alaskan in the entire state who did not support the idea. And I found her, two years ago: she's a lesbian who lives in an anarcho-syndicalist collective with three other ladies who draw their water from the local township's pump, have turned their living room into a hothouse, and sport a moose-proof fence outside their garden that is 15-feet high and reminded me vaguely of the perimeter defenses in Jurassic Park.

Now that the girls have pointed out that it takes some petrol to get their our-of-season heirloom purple-and-white-striped tomatoes to the local farmer's market, I've decided that that the residents of a state should actually have some say in whether that state's petroleum resources are harvested to tide us over the next 25 years, until we are all using fast-food fryer oil to power our private jets . . . what do you mean, that shit doesn't wok for aviation? Say what?"

Posted by: Attila Girl at 02:44 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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